true friends
What makes a true friend?
Is it talking to them each day? Must they live a few roads down? Maybe they know your deepest secrets or are the only names your parents remember?
The reasons are more genuine than those assumptions.
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Think about our relationships. The time spent with each of them and the numbers of those connections.
You’re born into a family. Hopefully loving and caring. But its amount is fixed from the beginning. And as years progress, your time with them becomes less inevitable. Less certain as you venture from home on your own journey.
Contrarily, selecting a life partner is a choice. A choice that comes with limitations. These relationships often flex between none or a few people; up to your choosing. Likely an intimate and person-limited relationship.
Hence, many of your years are spent with peers who aren’t family by blood or law. The masses of people you connect with won’t see you at the holiday dinner table or share your bed.
These individuals do not independently have the most lines in your story. Collectively their parts carry your plot. They’re rooted in your development and how your character is defined.
From childhood friends to classmates and co-workers. College peers and running mates. Friends of loved ones and drinking buddies. Camping caravans and besties. The list continues. From deep connections to causal links, we each are fortunate for our time with those beyond our defined relationships.
That is not to say all friend groups are equal. They aren’t. Some come and go. Others last the weathered years.
Certain friendships are solely function-based. Others start coincidently and lead to grander means.
Those, though, also are not what defines a true friend. Not to my eyes.
A true friend shows up. Not literally. Our worlds bring us to different goals and, hence, different places. A true friend is there. When the door knocks or the call comes thru, they’re besides us.
Thru the highest highs and the lowest lows. True friends are present. They don’t need the thickest of details nor be a consistent attendant. Whether we’ve seen each other the night before or years ago, their ubiquitous love is the truth.
In this light, a great friend keeps it real. Honest. To the point and without hesitation.
A true friend desires the best for me. Understanding that my happiness in a fleeting moment is not worth its weight if it jeopardizes me in the long haul.
A true friend loves me enough to tell me the truth, accepting me thru the anger and tears. If we’re going to be companions, working together to better each other is the friendship.
“Thru the highest highs and the lowest lows. True friends are present. They don’t need the thickest of details nor be a consistent attendant.”
And these definitions are not one-sided.
My obligation as a friend is to return the favor. I should not, accept your friendship if I can not return the partnership.
We will always have our laughs and smiles. Miles ran. Drinks drank. And experiences had. But, my friends, know I’m always here for the darker times too.
When the shade grows thicker and the pressure is mounting, I’m not backing down.
Here to crush together.
